Silly me... haiz...

I felt kinda silly today...

I surprised Al by turning out at the driving center after he finished his first ever practical lesson!
I felt kinda bad that he had misunderstood my intentions the other day abt having a car, driving etc. He was surprised Yes! YAY! Worth my effort to spent 50mins travelling there!

But the bomb fell on me when we transit pass the Hawker centre... Mich called out to me and we exchanged "hellos"!

Mich is my very dear mate from my old TPDB days.. we've been through alot as a team and I personally feel that I will 赴汤蹈火 for her. Unfortunately, she also happened to be HQ's coursemate (i knew this some time ago from an old photo at Al's place).

Then I saw the look on his face, I caught the "please-dun-recognise-me" kinda discomfort in his eyes...I guessed Al must have spent alot of time with HQ (and her mates) during school days as Mich recognised him right away and tot he was from the same course! He had to admit it, and then I was embarrassed... I felt sory for him to have to go through this, I felt sory for myself to be in this spot.

I was utterly disappointed; a spite of jealous got the better of me...
All this while, I kept reminding myself not to do anything that will make him feel insecure.
Now I am the one who feel really silly and stupid.
Now I am the one feeling insecure!
I suggested we not go dinner anyway, I have totally lost my appetite. But still we went.

Even Supa yummy Phoenix Claws with ground peanuts 补汤 failed to cheer me up much...
Maybe it was not all that easy for Al after all... as what he allows outsider or me to see...
They were together for the longest time ever! I should be more magnanimous!
By body size, I am bigger than many girls are, then my Heart should be proportionally BIGGER too!

I duno if Al could tell, I actually felt really sorry, for both of us - Are we really ready for this? Is he really ready for me? Am I ? Are we?
Yet I told myself to be strong. I stayed over, went back home the next morning to the comfort of my loving Kitties, my family and my friends...