Mummy & Creamie misses Cookie...loads

My Creamie has been acting weird recently...

1) She eats only with my company... even when I know she is really hungry, if I walk away - she will stop eating... she used to have to eat quickly else cookie will finish her share too....

2) She loiters around the spots that Cookie used to hang out / hide.... she will peek into hidding corners... look around.... when I shake the bell on Cookie's collar, she will get all perked up and start looking around here and there.... then looked at me in the most puzzled manner, seemingly asking:"Mummy, where is Ge Ge Cookie? Where did he hide? I dun wanna play hide N seek anymore! I wanna cuddle up with him... can u ask him to come out & play?"
*Ok, I know I invented the thoughts, but when u see her, you would have thought she's thinking that too...

3) She wanna alot of my attention... she "demands" to play FETCH with me.... she will come biting the rubba band in her mouth, drop in on my laptop, and use her head to nudge on my arm/hand.... she wants me to "shoot" the rubba band for her to fetch.... if I ignore her, she will "MEOW" at me loudly! She will repeatedly play fetch for abt 15-20mins, very long for her usually short attention span...

4) Cat Welfare Foster/Volunteer Raymond came over the other night, he could tell that she is sad and missing Cookie... haiz... cos it was at abt 8+9pm, the time when I usually get home and the time when she will start to Look for Cookie (he will come out from his hiding place to greet me)....

Haiz....

One of the rare moments to catch Creamie sleeping

so.... relaxed... so.... unguarded...

I brought Cookie home...

Mummy misses you Cookie Boy...

我一个人就好...

我想...我一个人就好...-----------刘力扬 - 一个人就好（《爱就宅一起》插曲）作词/作曲：徐旻铃 编曲：郑楠

街 挤满了欢笑
太不适合 眼泪凑热闹
快跑 快寻找 无人的转角
不优雅时候 一个人最好

爱 说退就退潮
我松开手 回忆却没放掉
未来 不来了 地球 继续绕
躲回温暖的梦 我一个人就好

为什麽 越相信谁能依靠
越换来 又一次灵魂寂寥
有没有永远 再不会让心绝望的解药
如果说 越踏出世界一脚
越不能 保留住天真微笑
那从今以后 我一个人过 就很好

心 很平静地跳
只是寂寞 潜伏像海啸
突然某一秒 偷袭我眼角
眼泪自己擦掉 我一个人很好

为什麽 越相信谁能依靠
越换来 又一次灵魂寂寥
有没有永远 再不会让心绝望的解药
如果说 越踏出世界一脚
越不能 保留住天真微笑
那从今以后 我一个人过 就很好

Sms from BroXiong...

My eldest brother, Xiong, came back from KL last night and came over to our house to pick up his domestic helper.

I had to break the news to him about Cookie, I feel responsible cos Xiong was the one who went with me to Meow/Adrian's house for viewing, he was with me when I first set eyes on lovely Cookie & Creamie & decided to bring them home with us.

When I explained to him what happened, he went on to try to slide open the window. He confirmed that it is rather difficult & heavy for a cat to be able to do that...I still cant believe Cookie is gone.

--------

At night, BroXiong msged me & we exchanged some smses:

"Yo Sis.Hope u r feeling better now. Ren Si Bu Ne Fu Sheng, Mai Si also the same. This is something non want it to happen. I guess it had paid the price of freedom. Or could it be paying for curiosity. Neither will bring it back to life. Besides, it had already enjoyed nine months of your abundant shower of love n care. God Blesses..."

"Thk u bro. Jus nw when I see u, I felt like hugging u n cry out. i cant cos I dun wanna scare Garren n papa. Cookie gone to be God's helper, make Him laugh, shower Him with the famous-cookie-rubba-rubba. God will bless him. Thank u for loving him n being with me. .."

"Ok. Will lend u my shoulders for u to cry on. But not so soon, if not will be soaking wet. That's y I chao so fast ma. Haha... Dont'think so much. Just learnt from Church camp, there may be animals in the new creation. As long as you remain in Christ n he in you, you will meet again. Mayb it went up to keep Yi Yi (Auntie Sammi)company 1st n Yi yi is taking care of it. Must be like that."

"Must be... =) Thanks man, feel better now knowing Yi yi will love him e way I do..."
------

I don't remb my Bro Xiong to be one who so expressive, esp with our brother sister relationship. We are never the kind who hang during birthdays, xmases or even at the demise of our love ones... but for the past days, it was his smses that finally make me feel a teeny bit better...

I finally have some space alone to cry out aloud... express my agony... I finally had the opprty to explain to Creamie what happened to her Ge ge Cookie...

-------

Creamie showed some shows of disorientation last night when we were alone in the room... she dug through the storage container under the TV... she peeked into the carrier... she circled my bed, lingered for a long time looking under where my pillows... she was looking for Cookie, these were all his favourite spots. Looking puzzled, she finally settled down in the dark staring at the famous "Prince Cookie's Throne sofa seat", seemingly keep watch just in case Cookie decides to sneak up for his snooze.

I find my head having lotsa space on my pillow, Cookie used to plow himself right behind my head when I sleep, or on the pillow beside the one I am sleeping on. I find myself putting my hands out to wanna touch him at the Throne Seat, where he so loved to sleep in the most awkward positions...

I cleaned my room yesterday... tearing away wiping all the stain marks that Cookie left on the sliding door cupboards... he has a way of sliding them open even when I attempted to past velcro on them... I havent the heart to throw our the Ikea boxes he bite thru yet, I never quite had the oppty to catch him at it so I havent really punished him for this destructive act... but suddenly I wish he was around to chew these boxes... I suddenly wouldnt mind going all the way to ikea to buy new ones...

I suddenly wished I havent force cleaned his ears the last afternoon we spent together... he hated it but I had to do it as his get dirty quite easily & I had to do it every week... I suddenly wished I havent spent time reading papers in the morning- I could have played with him when he was trying to hide under my papers playing PeekaBoo... at least I took some photos...



I wished Cookie is still around... Cookie must be manja-ing with Auntie Sammi in Heaven...I havent dreamt of her since she passed on, I always wonder if Heaven is too pretty & fun for her to come into my dream to visit me...

Will I dream of Cookie?
Will the temptation of endless supply of Kitty Can food be too much for Cookie to resist?

In Loving Memories of Cookie...

Cookie was a real tyrant... he
-chewed up all my ikea cardboard storage boxes,
-chewed my hp charger wire into 2 pieces!
-made me velcro all my sliding cupboards (somehow he still manages to open them)!
-gave me rubba lovingly (made all my pants furry like him)!
-finished all the food (including Creamie's)!
-Slept on my laptop, beside my laptop,& ON my laptop!
-Of course the habit of plogging himself at the exact spot I am reading on the newspaper!

Nevertheless, Cookie had been a real joy to have for the past 9mths...
Unconditional love he gave me & all who encountered him...

There are many things that I asked myself,
-Was I too careless that I failed to notice that he had enormous strength to slide open the window (even with 3 fingers, I have problem sliding it open... I tested and tested repeated last night)...I dun understand how he did it!
-Was I too late to send him to the hospital,
-Was it my fault....?

I just couldnt register... the vet had to tell me he is gone... twice, thrice... i fail to register that in my brain... i couldnt think straight... i still cant...

Creamie didnt show any shows of sadness last night.... but this morning, she started to become more sticky to me, asking for rubba, following me around the house... stared into the blank... she lost her friend, her play mate, he r brother... they have never been separated since birth... they were found together... fostered by Meow/Adrian together, adopted by me together... even when I punish 1 of them (locked up in the carrier), the other will cry nonstop, lying next to the carrier...

I duno how creamie will take it... I duno how I will take it... but I know I have to try...

I kept dreaming the scene last night, it kept painting... & worst, I imagined/dreamt that creamie followed suit the same outcome... It's difficult to not think abt it for the time being...

But I have to try... keep trying...

My darling Prince Cookie, may you bring God the same joy u brought me...
Mummy loves you & always will... =I

*Cookie went to God's home on 12 Jun 2009, approx 2145H.

S-O-S @ St.James!

Since I have a new bottle of Hennessy (unopened!) at St.James, i have had endless night of it in my dreams.. beckoning me to join it for a dance or 2, or to belt out a few K-songs!

Nope, me not a alcoholic, just enjoy a few good drinks with friends... letting our short hair down!

=D

So with the "mobilisation" in place... we launched OPERATION S-O-S (Save-Old-Soya)!

Our TF (Task Force) includes:

- CTG (Commander-Task-Group): Moi!!!

- CTG Co-ordinator: Eeleen

- Task Members: Weilin, Jordan, Stella, Vivy.

Comrades in hand!

Here's the evidence of our OPERATION S-O-S!

A not too bad achievement for e brand new bottle!

Frankly, this is the 1st time I reached home so early from a night of drinking.... 1+ am!!! Some record!!! Hahahah!

Today, I witnessed my darling Cookie at his most comical self!

Hiding under my newspaper!

My furKids never fail to make me laugh! Hahah!

Awww.... I simply love this!!!

This is what I call GOOD ADVERTISEMENT!

Ok, I confess... the word attracts my attention.... alot.... cos I love Pussies!
What can I say! I have 2 at home!! Wuahaha!

Expectations.... commitments.... I wanna run away!

Too many, oh too many things on my mind of late...

Expectations, so many demands taking toil on me...

Commitments, I so need to escape & be un-griped...

It seemed that I'll break away when under these...

Maybe I just aint good with handling obligations...

Maybe I need to shift aside when some1 gets close...

Maybe I would like to not be too dependent...

Or maybe I am just thinking too much...oh, way too much....

Is it my duty, to be accountable to others except meself?

Is it my responsibility, to ensure things are always proper & right?

Is it fair to undertake all these on my already droopy shoulders?

Then why is it my (*&)(^*$ Business to care!

Oh, F**K off! Give me a break! Let me be, just let me be!!

I wanna get out of here! Let me O-U-T!

Tickets booked! FINALLY!

Finally finally!

Tickets are booked and I am really travelling!
To MACAU!
YAY! I can visit KT! The offer of free accommodation & lotsa Catching up is too tempting to give up! YAY! KT, wait for me!!
Pity KT will be working most of the time & cant bring me around! *POUT*

Then I will zip to HKG - 买东西, 吃东西...买东西, 吃东西... YAY!!!
I wanna shop Shop SHOP!!! Hahha!

Then I wanna go Zhu Hai - heard it's shopper's paradise too & gadgets too!!! Wuahahah! Must get something man!!!

So many things to do, so little time! How?! =D
Wait for meeee!!! Wheeeeee! I am flying off! Counting down!!

Ultimate White & Dark Chocolate Baileys with Hazel Nuts & Almond Flakes!

Yes!!! That's the name of my latest baking project!

I was attached to Tamp Branch today & managed to leave work on time at 5pm, even when I went to Tamp1 to get something, I still reached home by 6pm! YAHOO!
So I decided to bake this recipe since I got the ingredients ready since Sunday!

Before Bake!

After Bake!

Frankly, I think these are the best bakes I have had... they really taste quite yummy to me & overall presentation, moisture, texture everything is good.... I give it 8.5 outa 10! Rather high points & honestly, I couldnt stop at just 1... the moisture chocolate taste & nutty texture just calls out to me!! OMG! I am crazy & insanely NOT SHY to praise my own bakes! hahah!

Anyway... I shall make them again soon for those who missed my "Ultimate White & Dark Chocolate Baileys with Hazel Nuts & Almond Flakes!"

Let Me Be... Oh just let me be!

Work Woes....

Dejected I feel... hanging by the loose thinning thread...
Even the float that was thrown to me is starting to deflat slowing...
I am not used to crying for S-O-S,
I usually deploy the method of deriving a survival method before I share my experience with others...
but today, I am jaded...jaded beyond words...
I actually sent S-O-S smses out...
Me wailing inside of me, desperating grasping for that last bit of air to survive a few minutes more...
Is that few minutes of survival really worth it? Or will I end up the living dead...

I think I need a break... I need to get away somewhere to blow my head off!
Pour those slimsy lousy rotten brain juices out, then cultivate new ones...
I need to just merely just survive... I need to want to survive...

Maybe I really ought to love money more... need to even want to die for money...
But I am anything but that...
Give me air, at least not take them away from me...

Oh grumpy bitter old me...
They said "there're alot pple worst off then thee!"
I said "oh just let me be..."

Forgetful Sunday!

I usually look forward to Sundays! but I duno why i am so forgetful and mindless today!

Wat a lousy start! I hate it when I dun have Newspaper in the morning! Feel so connected with the world! Esp on the day I enjoy the most - SUNDAY!
I have recently subscribed to the "Local" newspaper for 1 yr (these days they go by yearly only!) & paid a hefty $311+ for the whole year's subscription!

So can u imagine I was when
1st) The problem:" Your SUNDAY newspaper did not arrive this morning leh!"
2) Linda barged into the room at 8.15am to make this announcement
(F**K, dun the woman know I' still sleeping!?)
3) On a Sunday morning!
4) & I was scrambling to cover up my cute (& very sexy undies) with the blanket....
Aiyah, dun what she wans me to do, office dun open on a Sunday, just go out & buy a copy lor!

So I woke up, packed my bag for swimming training & left for the nearest NTUC, bot the papers, walked back to the bustop & waited a freaking 15 mins for bus number 8. Finally it came & ...

2nd: I boarded the bus, scanned my wallet & there was no "beep" sound. I searched frantically for the Ezlink card & I feared the worst - I dropped it at the bustop.

I quickly told the bus captain to let me alight (since still at the traffic light near the bustop. & ran back to the bustop - alas, no lonely Ezlink card waited for me there....

So bo bian, feeling very lousy (just topped up this spare card, value $30+), I walked back home to get the main card... luckily for me, I din drop it! It was in my running arm pouch cos I brought it with me the other day when I attempted the Bedok Res. challenge with Clarissa! I must be feeling too happy that day that I forgot to take it out! Heng ah!

so I went back to the bustop, waited 10mins before the next bus came & went to TP to swim.

When I reached the pool & was changing, I couldnt find my goggles...

3rd: F**K! I remembered distinctively that I packed it into the goggle pouch before keeping it in my bag! Mayb I did forget to place it in my bag..... argh!

So I bo bian, attempted 1 lap without it... no good.... lifeguard that I know not in yet (so cant borrow a decent pair of goggles).

Took the kicking board & kicked abt 6 laps... that's it, left for the bathing room after 30mins... what a day!

So i decided to go repeat what makes me happy! Eat Jap food at Takashimaya.... with vouchers! Wuahah! Cheapo me!

but 1st I need to take the bus there....
4th: Waited a freaking 25mins for express bus 518 only to board the bus 23 when the 3rd time it came... duno what got into me, alighted at Jalan Besah, wanting to take bus 111 but realised it no longer stop at this bustop... so waited 15 mins to get onto bus 65 to orchard & had to ask Uncle where to alight.... ssseeh!!! what terrible hiccups!

Anyway, Jap food makes me happy!

Jap Food Tray Before!

Jap Food Tray After!

Yummy! Maybe I got very worked up cos you know how the saying goes...

"A Hungry woman is an Angry Woman!

Feed that Woman!"

Wuahaha!

After 11 years, I finally did it! YAHOO!

It has been a long time wish of mine....

For some1 who did not exercised a single bit (ok, I did visit the Basket Ball court quite a bit then to drool over the basket ball guys!) for the whole of secondary school... it's a crazy thought!

Since poly year 1, every tues and thursday I would be doing this... running the Bedok Reservoir with a bunch of Dragonboat pple... the torturous 4.3 km.... oh I remember so clearly.... each time I will pant my lungs out and probably left different parts of my limbs every few hundred metres around the Reservoir....

After a few months of training, I can complete the round decently... but never more than that... It has always been a dream of mine to complete 2 rounds continuously...

I did just that tonight.... after 11 years of doubting myself... did it with Princess Clarissa's support... her presence is encouragement itself... I'm darn proud of myself and cant stop to awe in my own achievements... the 1st person I thought of telling is my dear friend, companion, soul mate, old dragonboat pal: Meimei (Rin)...

I know i may sound exaggerating... it's only 8.6km!! Come on, during this period of the year, every1 I know who does sports is telling me abt ADIDAS Sundown... Army Half Marathon... etc etc... mega distance running...

Bedok Reservoir has a special place in my heart... it's where I first started running... first pushed myself to the limits... my training ground for triathlon events... it's the place I run to during school days to vent off my anger.... there's a little hill/slope there where I see countless of students running up & down under watchful eyes of their coaches... on top of this small hill is a lone big tree, I used to sit by the tree and bury myself in a romance novel...

I love this place to bits... to "conquer" it finally... I feel strange inside of me... a weird tingling feeling... I ask myself this question: "what next? 3 rounds? is it possible for me to achieve?"

Until then... I am just very very happy.... my Bedok Reservoir have me & I have thee...=D

I have finally Committed myself!

Finally, today is the day… from this day, I will commit myself to another routine and schedule… another set of objectives…. New goals in myself… my life is on track!

Instead of “I DO..” I said “YES”… I choose “I AGREE” and hesitated… Then I clicked the “CONFIRM” button and finally registered myself for TRI-FACTOR Triathlon Olympics Distance Race on the 13th Sep 2009…

Yes, it’s going to be a feat for me… a feat which I may not have what it takes to complete… but I wanna try it… my aim, complete this category of race before I hit 30! My timeline is short, very short… I have to do it this Sep… or mayb latest next yr….

Of course I still have the chance to back out, dun turn up for the event lor! After all, it’s $50 buck! That’s the consolation I give myself, but I am going try…=)

Honestly, I have not even completed running >9km non-stop before in my whole 29yrs, to complete 10km after a 1.5km swim, and 40km biking…. I think I will probably die… this is one of the reason I was so eager to get the ID band a couple of weeks ago!

I figure I may probably die if not during the event, before the event while training! Hahah!

Mental Note: Remind Papa where is I keep my Insurance portfolio! Remind the pple whom I love – I love you guys a lot! Ahemmm… you know who you are! =D *WINK!*

Sunday at East Coast Park!

Ok, the start was lousy… honestly. I was being put in a difficult spot to deal with the situation… the agreement was to go jogging at ECP, long distance (prob 8-10km) with Sui, Ellen, while Meishan n Stella will cycle tandem (cos Stella is still not stable with cycling and meishan hates to jog).

In the end, becos Meishan chose to stay up late to do some work so not joining us, and Sui was sick. I only learnt abt this when I got into Ellen’s car. F**K! So what am I to do with Stella? I cant leave her to cycle alone, my plans to jog is spoilt, becos some pple simply dun think it’s impt to “merely mention” their absence to the others… hey! We had a plan!

Honestly, I was really sory that Stella had to tag along. What do they expect? Stella who lugged a Giant bag to stay over at my place the night before, struggled to wake up in the morning, worst – planned to spend a day honing her skills on cycling, TO GO BACK ALL THE WAY TO AMK? Then what abt me? Am I selfish to feel sory for myself that I keep my precious SUNday morning free and spolit my training plans – for these pple?
Argh!

In the end, I requested to cycle tandem with Stella and Ellen alone. It’s comforting that Ellen is a much easier person to get along than Myself! There were a few comforts…. Stella enjoyed herself cycling, I enjoyed the sun, Ellen is so easy to be with, we saw a very cute brown mini lop rabbit on leash (hence inspired me to leash training C&C soon) and I have rather YUMMY Braised Pork Trotters!

CAT LEASH TRAINING IN PROGRESS!

DO NOT DISTURB!

Trigger happy online shopping again!

Finally my merchandise arrived!
Item 1: ID Band!
Need to train more and clock longer distance, hence longer night runs! I figured since I am serious abt training, I have better get some safety gadget! Yes yes… I am gadget girl!

So I bought ID band online. Information includes: Full name, NRIC, Blood grp, Emergency Person to contact and contact number.

I think it’s rather decent, quite stylo in black n red, and very subtly imprinted fonts. Niceee!

Item 2: Pop up screen door!

It’s more like a make or break buy online. Not very expensive lah… try try see how… It’s more for C&C cos I think they quite poor thing in the room most of the time, if there’s a safe screen door on my door frame, at least they can see the outside abit more! Also more cooling for them in case the weather is damn hot (like these few days!)
it’s rather flimsy I must say…. Abit regret but hard to know unless you buy it mah. Havent got time to fix it on.

Still rather happy with the buy! Nothing beats coming home from a lousy day at work to see a parcel sitting on the table waiting for you to open! Though I know what’s inside, it’s still a rather nice surprise! Kekek!

Cutesy Hat & Bowtie!

Went for LeeLan's farewell lunch at Yio Chu Kang! Wow! Damn far lah!

We went to Sakura Jap Buffet! Yummy! I had lotsa Sashimi and yummy Tempura Ebi & shisamos! Shiok!!! Forgot to take pictures! But we had so much fun there! Taking rubbish candid shots with Shanz white COACH Shades! Cool!

Thereafter went for hair cut at The Central... nice.. I duno how Kevin do it, it's jus.... GOOOOOOOOood lah! Even my customers commented that the hairstyle really suits me & told me that I am glowing! They all asked if I am in L-O-V-E! Wuahahah! I am not telling them man! I only told them that I am always available, only if they have better recommendations! Wuahah!
So today, Kevin did it again with his magic fingers! Woooooooo.... niceee!!
Stella said the back like .... a character from ..... DRAGONBALL! *Faint!* Hahahah!

Went shopping thereafter, quick zip into ZARA & saw this nice hat! I love Hats, just that a bit poser to wear in Singapore.... less ocassion allows! Tried it on & impromtu snapped a shot!

I really love this photo! Quite Cutesy cos I wasnt really prepared! Too many onlookers lah!

Stella later added on a Bowtie with the photo editing prog from her HP. So cutesy!! Wuahaha! I am changing my wallpaper with this pic man!

Tried my hands with PICASA..... Just fooling around with the photos I have & came up with this... tot it's quite cute too! My darling babies!!

Operation Eng Seng Crab!

Today we venture out for Eng Seng Crab... I am not a Craby(crappy-pun intended!) person but I rather like the Black Pepper crab there! YUMMY!

I sobbed all the way thru! hahah! The pepper crab was good as usual but the Chilli crab were a little too starchy for my liking and SUPA Spicy hot!

After the teary crabs, we went to Katong Shopping Mall for KTV at TeoHeng! Wow! The last time I been there was in Sec 1 I think! hahah! U know, the boys will hang at the pool salon, and the girls will drool over them... hahah! I was there to make new school uniform lah!

Sang to our hearts content! Cheap lah this place! Wuahahah! 6 of us and only $47 including drinks for 3hrs! Good Deal!

Rest early for the nite, din wanna join the rest for Lunar... tmr still have to work! Boohoo... I want my wkends!

Orange Cheese Cake I Love Thee!

Decided to bake an orange cheese cake for Leelan's farewell... a promise is a promise!

So I decided to try one of those non bake recipe I found online. Viola! It's quite yummy! Kekekek! & Rather pretty too!

Next time I shall try those Bake style... like New York cheese cake etc! =)

My Babies are such joy to have!!!

My kitties are such Yoga Masters!! OMG!!

See Cookie’s awkward sleeping posture!

And who says Cats dun get along with Dogs?!

Cookie gets on fine with his Playmate,

DogDog the Schnauzer! Seeeee!!!

This is Creamie when she is extremely focused and into deep meditation! Sssshhhhh!

They love playing with the cheapest and

most entertaining toy I have improvised!

The wooden toothpick!

They can chase after it the whole day and

then happily playing hide and seek with it!!!

My Babies are such joy to have!!! Each day, they continue to amaze me with new things... their enthusiasm in discovering new happening give me the motivation to work harder!! =D

Awwwwwwww.....

Baking Orange Muffins and Nuaz!

Starry wanted to make Chocolate truffles for Mother’s Day…
The recipe seemed rather simple, but easy it is not!

While we had to wait for the chocolate to solidify… we baked some orange muffins (decided to bake this flavour cos the last time she didn’t really get to eat the proper Orange muffins I made)!

Must post the photos of her truffles when I get my hands on them! It was rather fun, moulding it and coating it in Cocoa Powder! Kept wanting to sneeze from the fine cocoa! Kekek!

Muffins are quick-perk-me-up-recipes! Abt 30mins preparing and 20 mins baking.. can all be done within 1 hour! Plus, the versatility of muffins recipe is a plus! I usually will open the fridge and dig into the fruits compartment and see if I can improvise the recipe abit!

So Starry gladly helped me grate the orange for the zest! With the $17 lemon zester of cos! She had to agree to with that $17 is worth it! Wuahahah! Makes the job much easier and enjoyable! =D


Nicee muffins rising in the oven! Probably the raising had to do with the cups I used too… this time round tried back the pretty pink cups! Of cos I took note of the beating of the eggs!

And Viola!! Niceee yummy Orange muffins!

The fragrance of orange filled the air!! YUMMY!